Self-Confidence plays a major role in how your relationships are progressing. If you do not feel confident in you then no other will feel confident in you. If you do not love yourself then you are not allowing your heart to open up for others to love you as well. You are placing a barrier, a wall of sorts blocking all the wonderful coming into your life.
As a single, you have a unique opportunity to take control of your life. Now….you are saying yes,……and? There are no clues, no wheels to re-invent. It is simply by getting clear on what you need for you and what you want for you! That is it…It is that simple!
Simply getting clear on what you need in order to be happy and fulfilled in a relationship.
Your level of self-esteem is the primary factor that influences your behavior in EVERY moment of your life! What is irritating are the key emotional moments that diminished self-esteem can hurt the most. Here is an example: In the area of dating and intimacy ~ poor self-esteem might prevent you from achieving the results you would like to see and feel by allowing limited beliefs to take over.
Over 85% of us experience some form of loss of self-esteem. But, for most poorest self-esteem occurs in certain situations or settings. Self-esteem comes from how:
Others treat us (Family, friends, spouses, teachers and so on)
Self-esteem is based on feeling confident and competent in life challenges
Self-esteem is also based on knowing and using our unique talent and strengths
GREAT NEWS…..Self-esteem is mainly learned…we are not born with it!
Our daily behaviors strongly impact our self-esteem. Having strong productive relationships and the ability to get along well with others is of importance for a strong level of self-esteem.
All too often, we react emotionally to what others say or do. Our reactions followed by the emotions of fear, anger or sadness, in return we give up our personal power. This reaction is often sourced in fear and low self-esteem.
Raising Self-Esteem will guide you through your consistency circle. (This is a full circle)
Make better choices
Develop better habits
Build better character
You are more valuable
Attract bigger and better opportunities
You will want to give and contribute more
Receive bigger better rewards
Be a successful single….Well, you may be thinking…Why should I be a successful single when I really just want a relationship?
Being a successful single leads you to a successful relationship! It does not mean you have to place your life on hold, your needs and your wants. Remember in the beginning I mentioned there is no re-inventing the wheel. The only thing you have to do is focus on you and what you want and what you need. The key is living your life fully in the present, and letting go of attachment and to future outcomes. If you apply the Law of Attraction…you know the emotional energy that you give anything you in return draw it to you. Living a life you want, you attract the opportunities, people and resources that align to you.
The foundation of Self-Esteem consists of 3 factors:
Unconditional Worth ~ you are important, worth it, valuable
Love ~ feeling, attitude, decision, skill
Growing ~ moving into the desired direction
All this = Self-Esteem….
Many people become frustrated because they try to start at the growth and forget the first two. Without a secure base our self-esteem topples.
Some key values that form a foundation for self-esteem are:
Safety Love
Happiness Security
Belonging Peace
Freedom Adventure
Intimacy Integrity
Communication Respect
Abundance Relief
When we honor the values we are happy with the life of meaning and our authentic self-esteem. What is authentic self-esteem? It means we feel good about how you see yourself. From birth and continued throughout our life we come across countless experiences that enhance or erode our self-esteem. When we diminish our self-esteem we simply do an observation that we somehow do not measure up. From that point on our lives unfold from our experiences to our expectations. We judge ourselves, we diminish our ability to give and to receive love and achieve the success and abundance we deserve. When our beliefs of “lack”(relationships, materials, wealth, happiness) we trigger those thoughts and feelings we fear most. The lower our self-esteem goes the less likely we are to act in a way that will achieve positive feedback. Whether an event occurs or someone said something to or at you we decide that we do not measure up. By identifying how we have lost confidence we can stop the low self-esteem.
There are 3 simple steps to get you started on re-training your subconscious mind. It helps to have a life coach guiding you through this process to really achieve greater results.
Be clear about what you REALLY want and be very specific
Consistently be aware of and weed out limited beliefs
Reprogram the subconscious mind (catching- canceling and restating) or FLEE or FILL as I like to call it. (you can catch my new video on Flee and Fill on YouTube or my web site www.dawnhogans.com or www.youtube.com/dawnhogans)
The process of catching-canceling and restating or FLEE and FILL limited beliefs will occur numerous times in a day. Every time you follow this process you are retraining the subconscious.
You are now in a position to upgrade your quality of life. Your quality of your life will be consistent with the choices you make from this point forward. Remember to FLEE and FILL and be a Successful Single!
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About the Author:
Dawn Hogan is a certified life coach, a workshop presenter, speaker and publisher of Aspire To Inspire newsletter and podcast. She specializes in personal, professional and self-confidence life coaching. Being an inspirational entrepreneur at heart and soul, Dawn worked in several industries as an employee, volunteer and entrepreneur, gaining a wealth of life experiences. She brings to her coaching her own successful life experiences of setting and achieving goals. Her motivated personality, organizational skills and value of personal achievement flow over to her coaching and clients. Having a great passsion to ensure her coaching sessions provide the necessary support, encouragement and understanding needed to create changes and bring balance to their personal and professional lives. Her passion for sacredness of life inspires and encourages her clients to see unlimited possibilities and put them into practice. Receive the life you are meant to live!
http://www.dawnhogans.com
Twitter: http://twitter.com/coachdawnhogan
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Hogans-Life-Coaching-Aspire-to-Inspire/360903136278
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